Brendan Makes was…

…once accused of being a oessay proofreaderne-man cult. He couldn’t decide if that was something to be proud of, or to be worried about. He didn’t think he believed in anything, but the idea seemed plausible. So he was thinking about it while out cycling one day, when he stopped to observe a raving man out on the street at the corner of Parliament and Gerrard, harassing the cars. The man spotted him and came lurching forward, dropped to his knee, took Brendan’s hand and kissed it feverishly! It was crazy. An even crazier thought came into his mind and he found himself asking out loud to the nuts dude kissing his hand, “Am I a King?” The man snorted and grimaced and made tons of crazy gesticulations, then squinted his eye and pointed at him, nodding his head and backing away slowly, and then he went back to raving at the cars. Brendan wondered why such a bizarre question had come out of his own mouth. Was he remembering something from the ancient past? Is that a thing? He consulted about it with a friend who read his tarot, and he found himself asking another surprising question: “Will I be able to make contact with celestial beings?” His friend was not excited about this question, and said that normally he shouldn’t be able to ask this, too heavy, but he would roll the tarot to see if it said 2 thumbs up. It did. Shortly after this event the tarot friend said “I have to break up with you as a friend, you’re too intense.” Brendan was really surprised and said, “What? But you’re the one that said you thought I was a shaman. And you’re just as intense, mr. psychic.” With the dense coldness of a scalpel his friend said, “That’s exactly the reason why we can’t be friends.” It was seriously a bummer but his friend’s argument was compelling. If they were to stay friends they’d probably go way off the deep end together, attempting to manipulate the fundamental forces of reality. And if none of it worked, they’d go argumentative essay topics

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